


Patricia Blum: Chronic New Kid

by DellaC626



Series: Adventure's In Romance: Loser's Club Edition [2]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/M, Henry Bowers Being an Asshole, Homophobic Language, I Love Patricia Blum Uris, M/M, Minor Violence, Patricia Blum Uris Loves Stanley Uris, Sassy Patricia Blum Uris, Sassy Stanley Uris, Sexual Harassment, Stanley Uris Loves Patricia Blum Uris, Stanley Uris is So Done, canon typical assholery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-26
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:20:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22343965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DellaC626/pseuds/DellaC626
Summary: Patricia Blum is pretty used to moving around and not having any friends. So when she lands in Derry, Maine, she’s not entirely sure what to expect. Certainly not a group of teens that break every rule her mother has ever enforced. But how does one really prepare for the boy of their not yet realized dreams or a band of unruly, but endearing outcasts?
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Implied Bill Denbrough/Mike Hanlon/Audra Phillips, Patricia Blum Uris/Stanley Uris
Series: Adventure's In Romance: Loser's Club Edition [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1539484
Comments: 6
Kudos: 16





	Patricia Blum: Chronic New Kid

**Author's Note:**

  * For [theliteraltrash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/theliteraltrash/gifts).



There were many things Ruth Blum told her daughter: don’t make friends with hoodlums, don’t you _dare_ do drugs or skip class, but most importantly; **_stay away from any and all boys_ **. 

“Do you hear me Patricia?” she would say. “All boys are looking for one thing and one thing only, you’d best stay away.” Patty would wait and roll eyes when her mother wasn’t looking. She would then reassure her that there was no way she’d get involved with any boys, school was too important, and she was an ugly little jewish girl. (Who in their right mind would want Patricia Rose Blum?) Ruth would frown deeply at her and shake her head. 

Little did Patty know that she would be breaking at least two out of four of those rules her first year at Derry High. 

Patty had been dropped off and escorted to the office, to collect her schedule and locker number. Now, she was waiting for the poor soul who was going to be showing her around, impatiently tapping her foot against the dirty floor. She'd heard mumbling of the name "Uris", whoever the hell that was. Patty just hoped they got here soon. She didn't want to be late. (Patty’s mother was already on her case, and it wasn’t even a day into her Junior year.) 

Normally she would have had more patience but today was important and her "guide" was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago. Patty found herself glaring intensely at the ugly tile flooring. Hopefully Uris was nice, she thought, that would surely make up for their tardiness. Her head snapped up at the sound of a scuffle in the hallway, two boys stumbled into the office. They were both fairly tall, at least by her standards. They didn't seem to have noticed her yet, stilling arguing loudly. 

"Shut the fuck up, Richie! I do not want to hear about your sex life, or lack there of." The lighter haired boy growled. The boy with dark hair, Richie, chuckled and shoved him playfully. Patty snorted as she watched the boys bicker. 

"Well, that's just because you haven't experienced the joy of _sex_ yet, Staniel. Once you get your dick wet for the first time, then we can have these adult talks!" Richie laughed, fist pumping dramatically. Patty rolled her eyes.

"If he uses phrases like that it'll never happen anyways." She mumbled. A sharp snort came from the direction of the boys. Patty felt her face heat up in embarrassment, they weren't meant to hear that. She opened her mouth to apologize when the secretary finally noticed the boys, interrupting her. 

"Mr. Uris, glad you could make it relatively on time, though with a companion like Mr. Tozier I don't imagine that happens often." The secretary said. Patty froze, that was Uris? The curly haired boy who looked entirely indifferent? "As for you Mr. Tozier, I highly doubt Miss Blum needs more than one guide. I suggest you head to class." 

Patty was still frozen in shock when Richie saluted jokingly and walked back out into the hall. (Though his gait was less human walk and more akin to an enthusiastic baby giraffe.) She turned to face the secretary and Uris. (Give her a break, she didn't know his first name yet and Mr. Uris sounded too weird.) The secretary was talking to Uris in a bored tone, giving him a rundown of what was expected of him. (Though the boy looked as close to rolling his eyes as she was.) Finally they turned to look at her and she saw his face close up for the first time. _Oh_ , he was breathtaking, soft curls, and eyes so deep she feared she would drown in them. 

"Alright Miss Blum, things are sorted. This is Mr. Uris, he'll show you around and make sure your first day runs smoothly." the secretary sighed. She really seemed to hate it here. Until she smiled softly, patting the boy on the shoulder. "Don't worry, he's a good kid." Uris didn’t even blink at her change in demeanor. He mostly looked bored, and maybe a little uncomfortable?

She went back to her desk, leaving them alone. Patty quickly averted her eyes, she was sure she had been staring, just not for how long. He made a humming noise, which sounded like a scream in the silence of the office. She turned her head back to him and he nodded towards the door. Patty gathered her things, making her way to the door. They stood in the hallway for a few moments before he cleared his throat and spoke. 

"So, what's your name? I know she said your last name is Blum and I'm sure you only know me as Mr. Uris." Patty fidgeted, unsure of whether to give him her nickname or what her mother called her. She sighed, it would be better to start with Patricia, he wasn't going to stick around long enough to worry about her nickname. 

"Patricia, and for your information I've been calling you Uris, Mr. Uris sounds too weird." Patty's nose scrunched up in distaste. The boy snorted, much like he had earlier. 

"Nice to meet you Patricia, I'm Stanley, Stan for short. Can I see your schedule?" Stan asked, holding out his hand. The name suited him, and his hands looked soft and strong. (What was she thinking? Patty Blum had no time for boys, besides her mother would skin her if she found out her guide _was_ a boy.)With a subtle shake of her head, she handed over her schedule. 

Stan looked it over for several minutes before frowning and pulling out his own schedule. Was something wrong with it? Had they messed something up and she wouldn't be able to take classes she needed? She was on the verge of a panic attack when Stan smiled softly. What did that mean? 

"Is-Is something wrong with my schedule Stanley?" She whispered, trying to reign in her anxiety. Having a panic attack on her in front of a cute boy, on her first day, because of a scheduling mishap would be extremely embarrassing. Stan looked startled for a moment. 

"No! It's nothing bad, we just have virtually identical schedules. Which means I'll be able to take you to all of your classes." He replied. Patty let out a sigh of relief, she felt a surge of _something_ , warmth maybe? (Whatever it was came with a strong urge to hug Stan and she was not okay with that. She didn't think he would be either, judging by his reaction to the office lady patting his shoulder.)

"Thank goodness, I was really worried that I wouldn't be able to take those classes. I don't want to be surrounded by idiots." Patty giggled, flushing when she realized how rude the last bit must have sounded. Would he think poorly of her?

-

When Stan was asked to help a new student and show them around, he wasn't sure what he expected, but Patricia Blum was not it. Richie had tagged along to the office and been rambling the whole away. Normally he would have been fine but there was only so much about Richie's "sex life" one needed to know. So finally Stan snapped at him, unaware of the small girl sitting on one of the uncomfortable office chairs. Richie replied in his usual manner and before Stan could even open his mouth to reply, a soft voice mumbled. 

"If he uses phrases like that it'll never happen anyways." Stan couldn't help it, he snorted. He looked around for the voice and realized it came from a small girl sitting in the office. How had they missed her? And more importantly, who was she? Before he could ask just that the secretary noticed him, pulling him into a pointless conversation. The only saving grace was that she was able to shoo Richie away. The lady at the desk reassured the girl that they'd be fine and then they were left alone. 

Stan wasn't sure what to do so he gestured to the door and they were off. Her name was Patricia Blum and they had almost identical schedules. She made little offhand comments that reminded him of Eddie, but nicer and less over the top. (Before Richie and Eddie got together the two would fight and bicker all the time. Eddie would go out of his way to push back when Richie pushed him and then the other losers would have to fix them. Not that they didn't now, but it was softer, more endearing now.) 

When Patricia giggled his stomach did some weird swoopy thing, perhaps he was getting sick. He felt his face heat up involuntarily, what was happening?

"I know how you feel, I'm constantly surrounded by idiots, but that's what I get for hanging out with the other losers. Anyways, I apologize for making you worried about your schedule. I just realized that with them being so similar it would make things easier." Stan laughed, shrugging casually. Maybe he'd been spending too much time with Richie. 

"Oh, well, in any case, I apologize for my comment. It was unnecessary, and probably a little bit rude. Thank you for your concern though." She replied, was he dreaming or was her face a little red? 

"Can I call you Patty?" He blurted out, what the hell? Where had that come from? "I mean I don't have to but it suits you and calling you Patricia doesn't sound like you." Stan almost groaned in frustration, was this what it felt like to be Richie? He was word vomiting all over, she probably thought he was super weird. 

"If you want to, I wasn't sure if-" she bit her lip. "I wasn't sure if you were going to stick around long enough for me to worry about a nickname to be honest, most people don't." She said, gaze firmly on the floor. 

Stan frowned, was she serious? Patty seemed funny and nice, there was something sarcastic in her humor. (She was also really really pretty.) Where had _that_ thought come from? (Sure he objectively knew girls were pretty but he'd never actively thought of one the way he was thinking of Patty.) He shook his head violently, hoping Patty wasn’t paying attention. 

"Why don't you come sit with my friends and I at lunch?" Stan asked. (He tried to be subtle, but would scold himself for being impulsive later.) He didn't like new people, what was he doing? Stan had just met this girl. Inviting people to be friends was more of a Bill or Bev thing. Stan was always the one who protested, so why was he inviting this virtual stranger to eat with them? He didn't know but figured it had to do with the fact that she was just like them, alone and afraid. 

"I would love that, are you sure I won’t be imposing?" She said softly. There was that irritating swooping feeling again. (He would have to talk to his mother about setting up a doctors appointment if it continued. It had to be a stomach bug or something of that nature.) Stan immediately shook his head when she asked, why was he shaking it so quickly? It wasn’t like she was going to say no. Well, he hoped she didn't, there was something intriguing about her. 

They stopped in front of their first class together, English, and he led her into the classroom. Patty was bombarded by the teacher asking her to introduce herself. She politely declined and was assigned the seat directly in front of Stan. The last person that sat in front of Stan had been a gross, mildly greasy kid who never seemed to shower and always ate during class. So having Patty, with her long dark hair and sensible, clean outfit was a step up. (It had absolutely nothing to do with the unknown swooping feeling.) He wondered if the other losers would like her. It wouldn’t be lunch for another couple of hours though, so there was no point dwelling on it. 

-

The next two classes carried on the same way. (Stan was compelled to stare at Patty and the girl was oblivious.) He didn’t understand why his eyes were drawn to her and why he felt queasy when he looked at her. Stan tried to talk to Eddie about it during their shared history class, but all he’d gotten in return was an eye roll. (If Eddie just rolled his eyes he could safely assume he wasn’t dying, right?) The lunch bell rang and Stan scrambled to meet Patty by the door of the classroom. There she was, blue eyes wide and shining enticingly. (Damn it, there was the feeling again. The sooner he knew what it was, the sooner he could make it go away.) Patty smiled softly when Stan made eye contact with her. 

“Hey, are you ready to go for lunch?” Stan asked, feeling much more nervous than before. He shook his head, it would be fine once he was with the other losers. It was a miracle that Patty hadn’t noticed his frequent head nodding. 

“Yes, I don’t know where the cafeteria is yet though. I look forward to meeting your friends.” Patty sighed. She looked a little bit anxious. “I’m sure they’re just as wonderful as you.” 

Stan blinked, had she just called him wonderful? Patty seemed to quickly catch up with what she said, her face turning an angry red. She squeaked and hid her face in her hands. ‘ _Cute’_ Stan thought. Stan coughed awkwardly and made his way into the hall, with any luck she would just follow him. 

“Cafeteria is this way. I’m not sure I would describe my friends as ‘wonderful’, obnoxious maybe. Don’t take anything they say seriously, especially anything that comes out of Richie’s mouth.” Stan huffed rolling his eyes. Patty snorted and moved to walk beside him. 

She was very excited to meet Stan’s other friends, they seemed like they would be easy to get along with. Patty hoped they would be at least, she didn’t have any good experiences when it came to new people. Stan himself seemed sweet, kind, and a little bit sassy. She liked that quality in a boy. (What was she thinking? She’d never even had a proper crush on a boy, but suddenly she had “qualities”she liked?) Patty shook her head briefly, hopefully she hadn’t drawn the attention of Stan. (Not that she would mind having Stan’s attention, those dark eyes staring into her own. If anything she’d love to have him stare at her, just not because she’d done something embarrassing.) Speaking of Stan, he appeared to find the floor extremely interesting. 

Stan was staring intensely at the floor and fighting the urge to look at Patty. He couldn’t figure out what was so interesting about her.

If he was honest, and he usually was, there wasn't anything particularly special about Patty. Sure she had perfect, long dark hair. He supposed some people might find that attractive. (It's not like Stan was imagining running his fingers through it or cradling her head as they kissed or anything.) Her eyes an almost eerie blue, skin ivory and soft looking. Maybe he could just reach over and grab her hand, just for a few moments? It wouldn't be for very long, only long enough to see if her skin was as soft as it looked. (Wow, that was a little creepy now that he thought about it. Stan wasn't sure where these thoughts were coming from. He'd been spending too much time around Richie and Ben.) Patty's hands were much smaller and paler than his own. Was it normal to notice the size of your friends hands? Were they friends? As Stan opened his mouth, Patty stopped abruptly. 

“Do you think your friends will like me? I mean, I’m kind of awkward and I’m terrible with people.” Patty said, wringing her hands. What if they hated her? 

"Are you kidding? They're going to love you." Stan reassured her. "Now come on, the line will be too long if we don't hurry." He said, dragging her through a set of double doors. 

-

Patty felt very self conscious as they made their way to a table of loud teens. There was Richie from earlier, holding the hand of a smaller boy who looked annoyed. A dark skinned boy was engaged in a conversation with a chubby boy that was waving his hands about as he spoke. The boy beside the chubby one watched fondly as Richie and the small boy started bickering. He was tall, or at least he seemed like he was. He was what Patty figured other girls would think attractive. Last, but not least, was a redhead who looked torn between laughing and slamming the arguing boys heads together. 

"-if I was gonna spend the night inside any women it would be the lovely Ms. Hanscom." Richie chuckled, leaning backwards to avoid the incoming slap from the small boy. He didn't seem to notice their arrival until Stan cleared his throat.

"What the actual fuck, Richie? The one time I bring a new person around and the first thing she hears is _that_?" Stan snapped, pinching the bridge of his nose. He should have taken her and ran, or maybe just told her to run while she had the chance. 

" _She_?" The tall boy asked.

"Yes, Bill, _she_. This is Patty, she's new and I invited her to sit with us but I'm sure we're both regretting that decision." Stan sighed, narrowing his eyes at Richie. 

"Well I'll be! Stan the Man has brought a girl home, he's finally becoming a real boy!" Richie teased. 

"What exactly does it mean to 'become a real boy', Mr. Tozier?" Patty scoffed with an eye roll. "Because if it's anything like 'getting his dick wet', then I'm sure Stanley will have better luck all on his own." Patty smirked, hand on her hip. 

The group went silent, until the small boy couldn't hold it any longer and started wheezing with laughter. All that did was set off a chain reaction and soon the rest were laughing just as hard. 

"Hi, I'm Eddie, welcome to the loser's club! I think you'll fit in just fine, anyone who can shut Richie down that quickly is my new best friend." The small boy said once he got his breath back. 

Patty smiled politely at him, introductions seemed to be going well and she had three out of six names down. 

"You're a riot, name's Richie, my friends call me 'Trashmouth'." Richie chuckled, as if she hadn't seen him in the office that morning.

"She was there,Trashmouth, when you were being particularly disgusting in the office." Stan said.

Were his friends stupid? First, there was Bill who had this look in his eyes, as if the lights were on but no one was home. Now, there was Richie who seemed to forget she'd seen them interact that morning. Patty had even went as far as to make a comment of her own. She could only pray to whatever diety was listening that the rest of them weren't this stupid. 

"Oh yeah! The door mouse that was sitting in one of them godawful chairs! Speaking of door- mice, this big boy is Benny boy Hanscom aka Haystack, spends all of his time at the local library." Richie exclaimed clapping the chubby one on the shoulder. "And this strapping young fellow, is the original HomeSchool himself, Mike Hanlon!" He leaned over to bring the dark skinned boy into an uncomfortably tight embrace. 

Ben seemed to be pouting and mumbled something to himself. (It sounded like " _Shut up Richie, I like the library."_ But Patty couldn't be sure.) The other boy, Mike, was clearly just annoyed. 

"I haven't been homeschooled since sixth grade Tozier, could you just let that nickname die?" He groaned, burying his face in his hands. 

"Hi, I'm Beverly, you can call me Bev. I'm the calm amongst the storm that is this dramatic bunch of asshats." The redhead grinned, reaching over to shake Patty's hand. 

"D-Don't let her fool you, s-she's just as bad as the rest of us. I'm Bill, by the way, welcome to this h-hell hole." Bill smiled softly at her, she would find it endearing if not for that vacant look in his eyes. 

"Hey! I'll have you know that my chaos is superior to the rest of yours." Richie pouted curling closer to Eddie, who seemed to have forgiven him for whatever dumb thing he'd said earlier.

Patty heard a put upon sigh and turned to look at Stan, the poor boy looked close to ripping his hair out. She reached up and patted him on the head reassuringly. 

Everything slowed down as Patty realized what she'd done. She hadn't even asked! Patricia Blum had just _touched_ someone, (A boy!) without their permission. What would her mother say? ( _Patricia Rose Blum, you harlot!_ ) She had finally made some friends and now they probably thought she was some touchy feely freak. 

"I'm sorry, I should have asked, we don't know each other well enough for me to be touching you out of nowhere!" Patty rambled, curling in on herself.

She had touched him. This tiny, admittedly cute girl put her soft hand on his head. And he froze like an absolute imbecile. Good lord, maybe he really was Richie. The brief second of contact felt warm and comforting. He might argue that it felt nice, good even. There were things she was making him feel that he wasn't sure he was ready for. 

"It's fine, you're fine. It was nice, and soft. Your hands are small, but thank you for being soft." Stan winced at the words flying out of his mouth. "Wait no, that's not what I meant! I meant, thank you for trying to make me feel better."

Patty was staring up at him with wide, hopeful eyes. She couldn't help it, giggles burst from her lips, much louder than intended. Stan smiled. Patty took a deep breath and looked him in the eye. 

"Thank you, I use really nice lotion. But if we're done talking about how soft I am, can we eat lunch now?" Patty playfully pouted. 

Stan huffed, moving to sit in one of two empty spots, conveniently left open beside one another. 

-

Lunch had gone well, they laughed together easily and Patty found herself more comfortable than she ever been. She couldn't keep her eyes off Stanley, he would get this look on his face whenever he talked to his friends, soft and content. It was incredibly endearing. Patty had struck up a conversation with Ben and Mike about books they'd read, by the time the bell rang the three had agreed to meet up at the library that weekend. Everything continued to go well until she and Stan were walking to their next shared class. 

Stan was rambling about birds, waving his hands enthusiastically as he talked, (Something he had no doubt picked up from Richie.) when he was abruptly slammed into the lockers. Stan hissed in pain as the figure pressed him further into the lockers.

"Watch where you're going Urine, maybe you should learn to use your beady little jew eyes." The figure sneered. Patty registered the voice as male. The boy was shorter than Stan, but bulkier, he had greasy blond hair. He reminded Patty vaguely of a skinny hog with the way his nose seemed squished and crooked, it had obviously been broken several times. Without warning, hog boy turned to Patty with a strange glint in his eyes.

"Well now, where did a pretty little thing like you come from?" The boy said with a disgusting smirk, grabbing her arm roughly. "What are you doin' hanging out with Urine, I could show you a good time. I'm sure that's what a girl like you is looking for, someone to mark up your pretty white skin." He whispered reaching to touch Patty's face.

Patty could feel her anxiety building, who was this disgusting boy to touch her out of nowhere? (Was this the kind of boy her mother warned her about?) She could see Stanley inching closer to her from behind hog boy, she didn't want him to have to save her. Patty focused on the boys bruising grip on her arm to stave off her panic. 

Patty slapped his hand away swiftly, face scrunching up in revulsion. She moved her hand and viciously dug her nails into the boys hand where it gripped her arm. The boy winced.

"I highly suggest you let go of me, before I do much more than claw you. From that point I would also suggest that you either go to hell or crawl back into the garbage heap you no doubt inhabit with your plebeian friends." Patty hissed, digging her nails in harder, making the boy cry out. 

"Fuck you, let go of me you fucking bitch!" He screamed, trying to back away. "You're bat shit crazy, no one is gonna want to fuck a bitch like you." 

Patty let go with a scoff. "Good, if you're all this town has to offer I should count my blessings." The boy scowled and scrambled to get away. Patty rubbed her arm, it hurt a bit still and would surely bruise. 

Stan stood stock still by the lockers, eyes comically wide. What the hell had just happened?

"Are you okay? I'm really sorry you had to be involved in that shit show." Stan sighed, reaching out to her. 

"It's fine, he was being a prick. Who is that guy anyway?" Patty asked, reassuringly waving her hand at him. Stan chuckled, prick was an understatement. 

Stan ran a hand through his curls. Patty watched them bounce back into place. "That's Henry Bowers, he and his friends are an absolute dumpster fire, complete scum." 

Patty nodded along, that explained a lot. Stanley sighed loudly, rubbing the back of his neck.

"He does that shit all the time, I'd understand if you decided not to hang out with me-with us anymore. Being bullied and sexually harassed isn't worth our friendship." Stan seemed resigned to this fact. 

"Nope, you're stuck with me." Patty replied with no hesitation. "Honestly Stanley, you're not supposed to try and get rid of new friends immediately. Besides the others love me, whatever would they say if they found out you abandoned me over a greasy, hog faced boy?" Patty snorted. 

-

While hanging out with the loser's had made Patty's lonely life a happier one, the continual harassment from the hog-faced boy made her want to scream. Not to mention her ever growing crush on Stan. Which made her realize how lonely and inexperienced she was. What, almost seventeen year old girl, had never been kissed? (Stan was handsome, smart, and overall a very wonderful person, there was no way he hadn't been kissed by anyone.) 

The loser's were mostly paired off, Ben and Bev, Richie and Eddie. (She was almost convinced Bill and Mike had something going on. Whether either boy knew remained to be seen.) This meant she and Stan were often left to their own devices. (Which usually meant bird watching together when it was Stan’s turn to choose their activity, Patty enjoyed the quiet and used that time to sketch.) She never dared tell her mother these things, not that her mother asked about anything other than her grades. 

Patty was excelling in her classes and well on her way to becoming Valedictorian, though she suspected Richie would beat her out for the position. She was only a few points behind him. (Everyone knew Richie was the school's resident genius, even people who hated him would begrudgingly agree that he was smart.) When Patty had first seen who she was being beaten out by for highest grade point average she was surprised. The surprise quickly turned into acceptance and pride for her friend. If she was losing to anyone she was glad it was someone worthy, even if that person was a trashmouth. The one thing Patty wasn’t prepared for was competing academically with Stanley. 

(No one was expecting her to start competing with the two smartest boys, especially not a few weeks into the new school year. They had an ongoing bet for whether or not the principal would let Richie give the Valedictory speech.)

Stan wasn't surprised that Patty had high grades, she was in the same AP classes as he and Richie after all. However, he was surprised when the girls grades were either just as high as or higher than his own. If it was anyone else Stan would have been annoyed, but somehow, knowing it was Patty made it feel like a push to be better. She was clearly very intelligent, Stan could appreciate that. He found he could appreciate a lot of things about Patty. 

After spending the last few months with her, (both accompanied by the other’s and alone), Stan came to the conclusion that he liked her. Or rather, he had a “crush” on her, as juvenile as it sounded. Lately anytime he opened his mouth around Patty he word vomited everywhere. (The only time the right thing came out was if he was saying something rude, or if he answered a question during class.) Stan was trying to reign in his feelings. He didn’t want to embarrass himself if she didn’t feel the same way. It wasn’t too hard to ignore them, if he didn’t look at her or speak to her, and stayed at least five feet away. Something about being in her presence made it difficult to function on basic human levels. 

The day was going well, Stan kept his composure and didn’t stare at her for too long during English. (At least he hoped he didn’t.) Then lunch time came and they were all situated at their usual table, talking about some dance that was coming up. (Winter Formal perhaps?) Stan was picking at the food on his tray and listening to Richie babble about a game he’d played recently. 

“Obviously I’ll be going with Ben.” Bev laughed gently squeezing said boys hand as she spoke. “Richie will probably take Eddie if they even go. That just leaves you and those three idiots, pick whichever one you’d like. I’m sure any of them would be willing to go with you, especially Bill!” she finished with a wink. 

Patty’s face scrunched up in confusion. Why would she want to go anywhere with Bumbling Bill Duncebrough? He lacked any and every appealing quality. Besides, weren’t he and Mike dating? 

“Yeah, c’mon P-Pattycakes! We’d have a g-great time and I’d t-totally r-rock your wo-orld after.” Bill grinned nudging her. Patty took a deep, calming breath. Stanley really was the only one with a brain wasn’t he? 

“You have the personality of wet cardboard, not to mention the mental capacity of a _frozen eggo waffle_.” Patty scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Why in the fresh hell would I go to a dance with you, let alone allow you to ‘rock my world’?” 

Stan snorted, he couldn’t help it. Patty being sassy was the highlight of his day more often than not. 

“I haven’t hung out with Mike one on one so it would be awkward, even though he’s very sweet.” Patty continued. “The only one I’d be comfortable going with is Stanley, I’ve spent time with him and I think he’s-” her face flushed. “Anyways, I _do not_ want to go with Bill.” Patty stammered. 

She’d forgotten to mention his relationship with Mike. (In her defense, she was too distracted by the utter repulsion that welled up at the thought of going anywhere romantic with Bill.)

Bill looked offended, Richie was stifling laughter behind his hand and even Eddie looked a moment away from laughter. They couldn’t keep it together for long though. Patty wasn’t laughing, she had her arms crossed, lips pursed in an adorable pout. Stan felt his heart flutter at the expression on her face. (How could a human being be that cute? Maybe she wasn’t really human at all, she could be one of those aliens with mind-control powers, like in the comics Richie so often read. There was no way someone could be so ethereal, like a 5’3” goddess. 

“I can take you, if you want to go. I wouldn’t mind, it might even be fun.” Stan found himself saying. (The last dance he’d been to was in middle school, Richie and Eddie had forced him to attend. Richie tore his pants and made Eddie cry, it had been a disaster.) Perhaps going with an actual date would make the dance worth while. 

“That would be great! But please don’t feel obligated, though I’m sure we would have fun.” Patty squeaked, gripping her skirt far too harshly. (Her mother would surely scold her for the wrinkles when she got home.The scolding would be worth it if it meant getting to see Stanley all dressed up. He was already devastatingly handsome, how would she survive seeing him in a suit?) Was he asking her out? No, he couldn’t be. Stanley probably saw it as helping a friend. 

“It’s not an obligation to spend an evening with a pretty girl, it’s a privilege.” Stan reassured her with a smirk. He cheered internally when her face flushed and she smiled softly as she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “I would be honored to escort you to the winter formal, Miss Blum.” 

“Why thank you Mr. Uris, I would be delighted.” she giggled, pretending to swoon. It was real swooning but no one but her needed to know that. (Richie would find out later when she ranted about how sweet and perfect Stanley was over text.) 

Stan felt like doing one of those ridiculous fist pumps Richie and Bill did. He had a date with the prettiest, most perfect girl in the whole school. Was this a date? He hadn’t actually asked, what if she wanted to go as friends? Stan bit his lip, contemplating asking her right then. (He thought better of it when he saw the glint in Richie and Eddie’s eyes, they would no doubt tease the two of them as soon as he asked.) Stan would just have to ask her later, there were still a few weeks until the dance, he had time. 

“So, what’s everyone wearing?” Bev asked, steering the conversation in a different direction. God bless Bev.

-

Patty somehow managed to convince her mother to let her attend the dance, on the grounds that Bev be the one to pick her up. Ruth wouldn’t be pleased to know that her daughter was going to the dance solely because a boy she liked asked her. Patty’s mother wasn’t even aware that she had male friends. Patty really only brought up Bev and Audra, a girl from her art class. Audra sometimes made disgusting googly eyes at Duncebrough between classes. (Patty couldn’t understand the appeal, unless you liked tall, dense, and whiny.) 

The boys were still an unintentionally kept secret from her over-zealous mother. Especially Stanley, god only knew what she would say if she found out that Patty had feelings for him. 

Patty watched her mother pull the ugliest, most outdated, floral dress out of the dust bunny filled attic. (She had been unsuccessful in convincing her mother to allow her to pick her own dress.) How was she supposed to impress Stanley if she looked like her great grandmother’s couch? 

-

Stan was proving to have picked up a few of Richie’s habits, as he’d forgotten to ask Patty if the dance was a date. He convinced himself that he had enough time to ask, he was wrong. (Procrastination was never good when homework was involved, why had he thought it would be good for building a possible relationship? They had even gone as far as to discuss the theme of the dance and if they would be matching, yet Stan couldn’t gather the courage to ask if it was a date.) He continued to chastise himself as he expertly tied the tie hanging around his neck. 

The suit he chose fit him well and made him look “hot”, according to Richie. (Stan had flushed a little and hit him with a pillow when he mentioned it. He looked to Eddie for support against Richie but saw the boy nodding in agreement instead.)

Stan stared at himself in the mirror, fidgeting while he tugged on the sleeves of his black blazer and aggressively blew a stray curl out of his face. Richie and Eddie were due to meet him out front his house in a few moments. Richie lived across the street and Eddie had gone home with him to get ready for the dance. 

-

Patty stood in her living room with a couple of hours to spare before the dance started. She felt like the ugliest porcelain doll in the floral dress, her hair in tight unflattering ringlets. The dress was frumpy and the stockings her mother handed her made her legs itch. Patty looked like she was going to a church gathering, not a high school dance. Not to mention, her head still ached from the way her mother brushed her hair. Patty’s ear was slightly burnt from her mother’s adventure with the curling iron. (Ruth insisted upon curling her hair, even though she hadn’t touched a curling iron since Patty had been born.) Finally she had enough of looking at herself. She ran to her room, retrieved her phone and made a very important phone call. 

Twenty minutes later a strong knock startled Patty out of her pity party. Patty raced to answer the door and grinned through her tears when she saw the person she’d been expecting. 

“Oh honey, what the hell are you wearing?” Bev gasped, pushing Patty back into the house, dropping her bag in the process. Patty looked like a preschooler in the 80’s. 

“My mother dug this out of the attic, I think she wore it to a dance in high school.” She pulled at the dress. “I look like my grandmother’s couch.” Patty laughed. “She says it’s indecent if it’s above the ankle and if you can see my shoulders, so I don’t know what I was expecting.” Bev’s face scrunch up in distaste. Patty snickered.

Bev sighed, walking back over to the door. She picked the bag up, carried it over to the couch and unzipped it. She pulled out a small makeup bag first, then she pulled out a garment bag. Patty frowned in confusion, she doubted that any of Bev’s dresses would fit her. (While Bev wasn’t flat chested, Patty herself was much more well endowed.) Bev unzipped the bag to reveal a long, off the shoulder dress. It was a stunning garnet colour, with a slit that appeared to go to one’s hip, it was beautiful. Although if her mother saw it she’d have an aneurysm. 

Bev draped the dress over the back of the Blum’s couch, nodded to herself and brought the other bags to the kitchen. Patty followed, feeling a little wary of the girl’s plan. Bev stopped beside the table, turning to face Patty. 

“Go shower, then we can get this show on the road, we don’t have long.” she ordered, brandishing a brush. Patty nodded and went to do as she was told. 

Once she could hear the shower running, Bev contemplated burning that disaster of a dress Patty had been wearing. She wanted to so badly but she knew that Mrs. Blum would not be pleased, the woman might even forbid Patty to spend time with her and the others. Bev distracted herself by organizing the makeup she’d brought with her and fidgeting with her bracelets. (They didn’t go with her dress but Ben had made them for her, she promised she’d never take them off. Bev would do anything for Ben.)

The dress she was wearing was the complete opposite of the one she’d chosen for Patty. It was icy blue with no sleeves to accompany the beaded top. Her hair was still fairly short, Bev found she enjoyed the curly mess it became at this length. The makeup look she’d gone with was based on a youtube tutorial for a ‘soft smokey eye’ she’d found. 

“I’m done, what’s first?” Patty announced, making her way into the kitchen. She had dressed in a soft nightgown her mother made at one of the retreats she’d gone on with Patty’s grandmother. (The nightgown was hideous, but Bev wouldn’t be the one to tell her that.) 

“Getting you dressed and out of that couch cover you’re wearing as pajamas.” Bev cringed, so much for not being the one to tell her it was hideous. Patty laughed much to her relief. 

“I know it’s horrendous, but my mother made us matching nightgowns.” Patty shrugged. “Besides, it’s hard to say no when your ninety year old grandmother holds up a matching one and makes a point of mentioning the decline in the amount of times she sees you.” Patty collected the dress from where it was draped over the back of the couch. 

Patty was so in awe of the dress Bev had selected for her, she feared she would ugly cry and ruin it. She bit her lip as she looked at the dress, did she even own the right undergarments to wear this dress? As she opened her mouth to relay the information to Bev, she was hit in the face with a small bag. Patty sputtered, catching the bag in her hands, she cautiously opened it. The contents of the bag made Patty’s face flush enough to match her dress.(Those were the most revealing pair of underwear she’d ever seen! The matching bra was admittedly very pretty and the lace was something she had never owned before.) What was the point in wearing something like that? No one would see them but her. 

“Bev! What’s the point in such undergarments, no one is going to see these but me?” Patty squeaked. Bev snorted, smirking at her. 

“For now, but I’m sure Stan will appreciate them if it comes to that.” Bev said with a wink. “And if he doesn’t, I’m sure someone else will.” 

“What? Stan’s not-and I’m not, we’re not-” Patty sputtered. “Stan doesn’t see me like that, he’s just being nice.” 

“We’ll see about that, now go get dressed before we run out of time!” Bev huffed, shoving the girl back towards her bedroom. 

(Any guy would fall head-over-heels for Patty when they saw her all dolled-up, even Stan! Patty was already pretty, but once she put on the dress Bev chose, she would be _stunning_. No one would be able to resist.) 

Patty struggled for a moment with the undergarments, afraid she’d ruin them if she was too rough. But, with some wiggling and a little readjusting, everything was in place. (She wasn’t entirely sure how Bev got her bra size, but decided she didn’t want to know.) Slipping into the dress was the easy part. 

Patty looked at herself in the mirror and inhaled sharply, she looked like an entirely different person. She felt like she was playing dress up with someone else’s wardrobe. (Not the wardrobe of anyone in her family that was for sure.) Patty took a deep breath and twirled a little to watch the dress move with her. It really was a beautiful dress, and surprising well fitted. 

“Are you done?” Bev yelled from the kitchen. “I’d like to finish getting you ready some time this year!” 

Patty rolled her eyes, picking up her discarded outfit with one hand, and gripping the skirt of her dress in the other. She dropped her clothes in the hamper by the door and made her way to the kitchen. 

“How did you get my size by the way?” Patty asked from the doorway of the kitchen. Bev didn’t respond, she only grinned widely and gestured for the girl to take a seat. 

“Don’t you worry about that, my dear.” Bev winked, giving Patty an approving look. “I’ve outdone myself.” 

Patty snorted but sat down in front of Bev nonetheless. She was a little nervous if she was honest, makeup wasn’t really her thing. Simple things, like mascara and lip gloss, sure. But glamorous party makeup? Never in a million years. 

There were so many makeup items on the table in front of her that Patty had a hard time concentrating. She could pick out the mascara and lip products easily, but what in the world was that egg shaped sponge? Just as her hand reached to touch the sponge, Bev slapped her hand away. 

"No, don't touch, we don't have time for you to fiddle with everything." Bev said chidingly. "Let me work my magic and then we can go!" 

Patty put her hands in her lap, Bev pressed a button on her phone and suddenly Patty was sucked into some sort of girl power makeover montage. 

-

When Richie told Stan that he’d actually tried to find an appropriate suit for the dance, he wasn’t sure what he expected, but a well groomed Richie in a well fitted suit was not it. Eddie’s suit was subtle compared to Richie’s floral print, with accent colors so you could tell the two boys matched. The floral pattern of Richie’s suit was surprisingly tasteful, his hair was clean and tamed. Overall Richie looked like a well put together human instead of a thrift store tourist. 

“Are we goin’ or not Staniel? I know I’m hot shit but we don’t have time for you to gawk at my majesty.” Richie teased, hand dramatically placed on his hip. (He looked like his father, anyone that met Wentworth Tozier would be able to tell that Richie got his flair for the dramatic from that man.) Eddie stood just behind him with a fond smile. 

“Let’s go Trashmouth.” Stan said, rolling his eyes at his best friend. He watched as Richie practically ran for the passenger side door of his car. Eddie followed after him at a much more sedate pace. Richie clamoured into the seat with all the grace of a newborn deer. Stan sighed when he slammed the door. 

Ten minutes, and one irritated hand slap later, the boys found themselves in the school parking lot. Richie was still whining about his hand hurting, even going as far as to ask Eddie to kiss it better. He didn’t, instead making direct eye contact and pushing Richie out of the car. Miraculously, Richie didn’t fall managing to catch himself and only stumbling slightly. Stan was impressed, his best friend spent more time tripping over things than anything else. 

“Hey, It’s rude to shove your date, Eds!” Richie whined, brushing himself off. Eddie scoffed, but grabbed his hand nonetheless. “Speaking of dates, did you ask Patty-Cakes if tonight is a date?” Eddie raised his eyebrow at Stan pointedly. 

Stan flushed, he was never going to live this down. 

“I never got around to it, I thought I had time but then time ran out and I just never asked. I’ve probably spent too much time with you, Richie.” Stan mumbled awkwardly. He resisted the urge to run his hand through his hair. To his surprise neither boy laughed, opting to give him looks of pity instead. Stan wasn’t sure if that was worse than laughing, but then Richie gave him a sympathetic shoulder pat. 

“C’mon Stan, just make sure you tell her how you feel before someone else snatches her up, yeah?” Richie sighed. Stan almost groaned. When Richie Tozier pitied you _and_ gave you love advice your life was probably a wreck. Stan didn’t reply, making his way to the front doors, grumbling to himself the whole way. He could hear Richie snort from behind him. 

Stan pulled open the door and slipped inside, foolishly thinking he would get a few moments of peace. The only peace he ever got was during the rare moments alone with Richie. (That wasn’t true, he got plenty of peace when he was with Patty.) Stan made a noise very close to a whimper at the sheer amount of people in the hall. How in the fuck was he supposed to find Patty in this mess? Sure, he was relatively tall, but there were just too many people. Just as he was resigning himself to that fact, a voice called out his name. 

“Stan!” It was Bill, Mike, and a small red-head, Stan thought her name was Audra. “H-Have you s-seen the girls a-and Ben yet?” Bill asked, he looked so excited he might vibrate out of his skin. Stan shook his head, feeling much less anxious in the wake of all the people. 

“Damn Staniel, you disappeared so quickly we thought you might be trying to escape us!” Richie joked, coming to stand with his friends. Stan winced a little, smiling apologetically, he hadn’t meant to leave them behind. He inhaled, preparing to apologize when he heard the rapid clicking of heels. 

“Hey! I thought we were going to be late, Patty and I had much more to do than I thought and then Ben needed help with his tie.” Bev huffed, smile giving away her amusement. Stan looked around, brow furrowed. Where was Patty?

“Where is our little Patty Cakes?” Richie asked, throwing an arm around Bev and Ben. Stan hadn’t even noticed Ben until just then, too focused on finding Patty. 

“I h-haven’t s-seen her yet, d-did she get l-lost?” Bill frowned, head tilted like a puppy. Mike sighed softly, patting Bill on the shoulder and nodding to Audra. Bev didn’t bother replying, focusing on Ben instead. 

“I’m so sorry, I had to use the bathroom and fuck if this dress isn’t a pain to work around.” Patty huffed. She flushed in embarrassment when everyone turned to her. Why were they looking at her like that? Bev had tried her best with what Patty had to offer, surely she didn’t look that bad. The longer the silence continued the more Patty felt her anxiety rising. 

Stan choked back a gasp. She looked incredible, Stan didn’t think he could find her more attractive than he usually did. There was something tantalizing about her bare shoulders and the contrast between the red of her dress and her pale skin. (Not in a weird way of course. God it sounded like he was the reason for school dress codes that don’t allow girls to show their shoulders.) The way her dark hair seemed to billow around her, the bright red of her lipstick drawing attention to full lips. Every bit of her inherent beauty was magnified in that moment. It felt like every breath of air had been stolen from his lungs by Patty. 

“Damn Patty-Cakes, you clean up good!” Richie let out a low appreciative whistle. He winked outrageously at Patty. Patty giggled, willing herself not to blush. It was just Richie being Richie. 

"You're not so bad yourself, Trashmouth." Patty said playfully. "Though you've got nothing on Stanley." Patty smirked. 

Stan made a keening noise. (It reminded Patty of the time she stepped on her grandmother's chihuahua one summer.) He turned an interesting shade and seemed to be struggling to find words. Richie took pity on him, reaching around Ben to pat Stan on the shoulder. 

"C'mon Stan the Man, let's head to the gym and see what this shindig has to offer." Richie said with a cheeky grin. Stan wanted to glare at him but he was still reeling from Patty's comment. Was that flirting? 

Patty was proud of herself. (If she could make Stanley half as flustered as he made her, they'd be on more even ground.) She had never made anyone flush like Stanley. It made her feel a little empowered, confident. There was something thrilling about teasing your date. Patty almost bit her lip, but decided tasting her lipstick wasn't worth it. Stanley hadn't said this was a date and she had been too afraid to ask. 

"I know you're overthinking things with that big brain of yours." Bev joked. "But how about we actually get into the dance before you flee." Bev linked arms with Patty and strutted into the gymnasium. 

-

The gym was covered is various shades of ruby and sapphire, streamers up in intricate patterns, matching balloons scattered throughout. It looked amazing, everything was bathed in alternating red and blue. It almost made the hell hole of a school seem elegant, not much could do that, not in Derry. Though right now the most elegant thing there was Patty if Stan said so himself. He glanced around the gym in hopes of catching a glimpse of her. 

There she was, arm-in-arm with Bev. Patty was grinning at whatever Bev said. He could picture the mischievous twinkle in her eyes. Stan found himself manoeuvring through the throngs of people.

"Stan?" Richie called. "Where are you going this time?" He hadn't moved very far but Richie looked out of breath. Eddie was trailing behind him, looking much more put together. 

“I know Richie is hard on the eyes but come on Stan, you don’t need to keep running away.” Eddie joked, elbowing Richie in the ribs when he made an affronted noise. 

Stan rolled his eyes, he wasn’t running away, he was going to talk to Patty. 

Stan told them as much before continuing to make his way over. Maybe he would finally gather the courage to ask her if this was a date. (Probably not, but Stan could hope.) As he got closer he could hear Patty’s adorable laughter. He’d never be able to get her out of his head, especially the way she looked tonight. Not that she didn’t look stunning regularly.

“Hey Stan!” Bev exclaimed, nudging Patty discreetly. “Did you come to collect your date?” Patty squeaked. What was Bev doing? They hadn’t exactly had that conversation, what if Stan didn’t want it to be a date? What if he thought it was weird?

“I-yes, yes I am. I mean-I did.” Stan stammered. He looked a little flushed, was he feeling ill? Patty frowned, she really hoped not. If he was she would miss the opportunity to dance with him. (Wait, Stan actually answered Bev’s question. Had he said that this was a date? Or rather, had he _implied_ that it was a date?) Patty couldn’t help but grin. (It was a date, she had a date!) Patty shuffled over to him, sweetly intertwined their fingers, and dragged him away. 

  
  
  


The two stopped at one of the smaller tables that were tastefully set up at the back of the gym. Stan pulled out a chair for Patty, beaming at her as he did. Being there with her almost seemed surreal. The lights bathed Patty in an ethereal glow. Stan said before that she seemed like a goddess to him, tonight proved it. Everything about her made Stan’s heart race and melt in equal measure. He tried to refrain from using the word perfect, as things seldom were. But if anything (or anyone) was perfect, it was the girl sitting across from him. From her cascading, chestnut locks of hair, to the way she snorted when she laughed. 

“I’m really glad I’m here with you right now.” Patty yelled over the music. “ I didn’t think I’d ever go on a date with anyone, but I’m glad it’s you.” Stan couldn’t help but flush a bit. He was rarely at a loss for words. (It was just that, unlike Richie, he knew when to keep those words to himself.) But he needed to take a moment to gather his thoughts. It was like that with Patty often, everything she said was thought provoking. 

“Me too. I’ve never dated anyone, but I think I would have regretted it if I didn’t even try, with you I mean.” Stan yelled back. Patty was incredible, how had no one wanted to date her? She was beautiful, intelligent, easy to get along with, and many other wonderful things. Stan resisted the urge to shake his head. Their loss was his gain he supposed. 

Patty smiled softly, reaching over to take Stan’s hand into her own. She couldn’t help but admire how well their hands seemed to fit together. It was a testament to Stan’s trust in her when he didn’t so much as flinch when she tangled their fingers together. She couldn’t find it in her to let go. The way it felt to hold his hand made her think she’d found her soulmate. Patty was never one to believe in soulmates and magic. But with Stan, it seemed that anything was possible. She just hoped that he felt the same way. 

“I don’t know what I would do if I’d never met you.” Patty sighed. 

Stan wasn’t sure what Patty said to make her have such a solemn look on her pretty face. But, he wanted to do whatever he could to make it go away. Stan scoured the room, looking for ideas of how to cheer Patty up. Maybe it would have been a solid idea to tell her how he felt about her while they were alone, but the music made that almost impossible. Not to mention the fact that love confessions probably weren’t the most romantic if you screamed them at the recipient. He could ask her to dance. (He hadn’t taken dance lessons for his bar mitzvah for nothing.) As if hearing his thoughts, the music slowed. The track changed to a song Patty would frequently play during their one-on-one time. 

“Would you like to dance?” Stan asked nervously. To his delight, Patty nodded vigorously. She immediately let go of his hand to stand and gently push her chair in. Stan frowned at the loss of warmth. It had only been a moment, yet he missed the feeling of her hand in his. Stan’s disappointment was short lived when Patty intertwined their fingers once more and dragged him to the dance floor. 

-

Knowing how Stan felt about people Patty tried to stay close to the edge of the dance floor. She really liked Stan and he seemed to like her. Patty wanted to keep it that way. (There was no way that Stan would have appreciated being dragged into the middle of the dancefloor.) Patty found a nice spot, not too far from one of the exits if Stan needed some air. (Or, if _she_ needed air.) She was so busy pulling Stan around that she hadn’t been looking at his face. So, when they stood comfortably in their spot, she was not prepared for the intense look in his eyes. 

Patty felt her breath hitch. How long had he been looking at her like that? It made her feel jittery and all too warm for a school dance. She was still reeling from the look in his eyes when he pulled her flush against him. This was the closest they had ever been to each other and Patty wasn’t sure how to respond. She found herself screaming internally. What was she supposed to do? In a normal situation a girl would have leaned her head on the boy’s shoulder and fell into the embrace. But she wasn’t a girl in a _normal_ situation. She was Patty, and he was Stan and they’d never done this. 

“Is this okay?” Stan asked cautiously. “Holding you this way, I mean.” He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable but it felt almost perfect to hold her this close. Stan had only intended on pulling her a tiny bit closer, but he was unable to deny the rightness of having her pressed against him. 

“Y-Yes, this is good. It’s fine, it’s-” Patty swallowed thickly. “It’s nice. It feels right?” She scrunched up her nose, was it too forward to tell him being this way felt right? Oh well, it was too late to take it back now. 

Stan stared at Patty in wonder. How had he managed to find a girl like her? Sometimes he thought she was too amazing to be real. As much as Richie and Eddie bickered they really did love each other and Stan had been hoping to find something like what they had. Looking at Patty, Stan felt he might have found it. 

“Good.” Stan replied, putting one hand on the small of her back. The other resting comfortably on her hip. He smiled encouragingly at her, prompting her to wrap her arms around his neck. They stayed impossibly close for the duration of the song, neither of them wanting to separate. 

-

They danced and chatted for hours, losing themselves in each other. Bev and Audra had come to steal Patty away with a wink. Stan didn’t get a chance to pout before Richie threw an arm over his shoulder. 

“So, did you finally tell her how you feel?” Richie asked. Eddie sighed from beside him, leaning heavily into Richie’s side. (He was probably ready to go home.) 

“Sort of, but I think she kind of already-” a sudden crash and screams of expletives steal the boy’s attention. All three boys's heads turn in the direction of the crash. There, in the middle of the gym, is Bill and Henry Bowers. There’s blood running down Bowers’ face, a sure sign that Bill got a few good hits in. Bill isn’t exactly one to get into fist fights. 

“Whoa, what the fuck is Big Bill doing?” Richie grumbled. Stan really hoped that Richie wouldn't try to intervene, because no matter what Bill did to piss off Bowers, Bowers still hated Richie the most. Eddie, sensing Richie’s recklessness bubbling up, grabbed his boyfriend’s arm and pulled him back. 

“Nuh uh, no way am I am cleaning up a bloody, bruised Trashmouth.” Eddie deadpans. Stan strongly suspects that the only reason Richie backs down is the scary side-eye Eddie is giving him. 

“What makes you think I’d be the one that ends up bruised and bloody anyways? Have some faith in me Eds.” Richie whined. Eddie laughs, not even trying to hide it. 

“Richie, I love you. I have so much faith in you, I really do. Just not when you think you’re Rocky when really you’re the Wacky Inflatable Tubeman.” Eddie gave him a supportive arm pat and a loving kiss on the cheek. (As if that would soften the blow.) Richie sputtered indignantly. 

“C’mon Richie, we don’t have time for you to pout.” Stan huffed. They really needed to go and possibly save Bill. 

“Alright hold your horses Staniel.” Richie took Eddie’s hand in his own and headed in the direction of Bill and Bowers. The fight seemed to be getting worse. (Even if the teachers hadn’t all left to smoke, or god only knows what else, they still didn’t care enough to break anything up.) 

“So, you’re a fairy just like your four eyed, faggot friend!” Bowers shouted, lurching towards Bill. Bill staggered backwards to avoid Bowers’ fist. 

Eddie snorted from beside Richie. Stan could only assume that Eddie was thinking the same thing he was. (Couldn’t Bowers be more creative if he was going to be a blatant homophobe?) 

“S-So what if I am? You j-jealous Bowers?” Bill spat. He seemed dangerously close to launching himself at Bowers. 

“No! What the fuck is wrong with you?” Bowers growled. 

“C’mon now Bowers, you don’t sound so sure.” Richie chuckled. Stan looked over at Richie and to his relief, Eddie still had a firm grip on Richie’s arm. 

As fun as this whole situation was, Stan really didn’t want to get kicked out. Just as he stepped forward to intervene, (and possibly get beaten to a pulp), the girls, Mike, and Ben came rushing towards them. 

“Really Bowers?” Bev scoffed, crossing her arms. Ben stood defensively at her side, though everyone knew he wouldn’t physically get involved. Mike and Patty, both looking equally irritated, stood less than a foot away from the couple. Patty in particular seemed ready to drag her hands down her face in frustration. Aforementioned girl, snorted indelicately. 

“Honestly, I know you’re obsessed with us, and you crave our attention or whatever. But seriously, out of _all_ of these fine men, you choose _Bill_?” Patty groaned. “I knew you were a disgusting cretin, but you couldn’t have some taste?” 

Bowers sputtered turning redder than any of them had ever seen. But Patty just kept speaking, ignoring Bill’s offended ‘Hey!’. 

“There’s Ben, who’s adorable and an absolute sweetheart. Or Mike, have you _seen_ his arms in a tank top?” Patty ranted, starting to make wild gestures. “Eddie is a spitfire and gives off ‘angry sexy’ vibes. Richie is a loud mouth, but _damn those legs_ . What about Stan? Who is literally an angel, with perfect curls, beautiful eyes, and the best personality. But no, you choose _bumbling Bill_!” 

Richie couldn’t help it, the look on Bowers face was killing him. He started howling with laughter. (How could he not when Bowers looked like he’d swallowed several lemons?) The sound of Eddie’s laughter soon joined. Richie’s laughter, though obnoxious, was also contagious. The rest of the losers couldn’t help but join in, minus Patty who was still frowning. Even Audra couldn’t help but let a few giggles escape. 

“Glad to know you think so highly of us Patty-Cakes.” Richie wheezed, leaning in Eddie for support. 

“I was just pointing out his poor selection.” Patty huffed. “Speaking of the hog-faced boy, if you’re quite done playing the closeted homophobe, could you kindly _fuck off_?” 

“Whatever, I would have won the fight anyways.” Bowers sneered, shoving Bill as he left. 

The losers laughed together for a while long before breaking off into their respective couples. Each of them hoping to spend some more time with their date before the end of the night. 

-

“So, I’m a ‘literal angel, with perfect curls’, am I?” Stan teased. (The two had escaped into the hall, and were sitting on the floor against some lockers.) Patty squawked indignantly.. 

“Shut up! Just because I think you’re aesthetically pleasing, doesn’t mean I’m going to constantly stroke your ego.” Patty stuttered, burying her face in her knees. 

“There’s no judgement from me.” Stan replied, it was his turn to flush. “Besides, Richie will judge enough for both of us. Especially since he had to listen to me go on about how you’re a goddess with the most captivating blue eyes.” 

Patty didn’t know what to say. Out of every possible outcome she had thought of, she hadn’t prepared for this. (Yes, she knew that they both agreed that this was a date and that that implied her feelings were returned, but that _did not_ mean she was prepared to be called a goddess.) There was nothing to prepare you for being called a goddess by the boy you were at least half way in love with. 

“I really like you, probably more than I’ve ever liked anyone. I didn’t really look at girls, or guys, anyone really. Not before I met you.” Stan sighed. “I know it sounds cliche and so fucking ridiculous, but I think I might be a little bit in love with you. But, if you don’t want anything to do with me that’s fine and I’ll completely understa-” 

Any other time Stan would have scolded the person who interrupted him. But this time he wouldn’t dare, because it was Patty, and she happened to be interrupting with her lips. (Which were remarkably soft. Not that he had a wide range of kisses for comparison. He and Richie kissed once when they were thirteen, for practice.) Kissing Patty somehow felt like coming home. It was the cookies Richie’s mom would bake, the utter peace he felt when bird watching. 

In this moment, Patty was everything. 

“I’m a little bit in love with you too.” Patty said with a soft smile. The attractive flush on her cheeks tempted Stan. Most of her lipstick was gone, presumably staining his lips instead. That didn’t make her any less alluring, she was always beautiful to him. 

  
  


Stan’s mind was entirely blank, save for an erratic voice whispering ‘ _Patty…..Patty…..Kiss her….’._

So he did.


End file.
